Life as a Christian Woman

Prophetess Juanita Bynum and her husband/attacker appeared in court on Tuesday for his sentencing. Taking into consideration a personal plea from Dr. Bynum not to give jail time, Bishop Weeks received three years probation and 200 hours of non-church related community service. He also must complete anger management counseling.

According to the AP, Dr. Bynum and her husband are “working on their marriage and the status of their relationship.” They left the courthouse together after the sentencing.

The attack on Dr. Bynum by Bishop Weeks occured in the parking lot of an Atlanta hotel last August. LCW reported on the incident in two previous articles, Televangelist Juanita Bynum Assaulted by Husband and Dr. Bynum’s Attack Brings to Light Abuse in Christian Marriage.

The story was hotly debated between supporters of both parties, with some even blaming Prophetess Bynum for her husband’s behavior. No indications have been made that Bishop Weeks had ever physically harmed his wife prior to the August attack. Dr. Bynum has shown courage and strength of faith in her recovery and dealing with the aftermath of intense public interest in a very private matter.

Would you have done the same in a similar situation? LCW has explored domestic violence in Christian marriage in the past. Arguments and Biblical justification have been given for both getting out of the situation and pursuing divorce, and remaining married and trying to work through it. In light of Juanita Bynum’s apparent decision to at least attempt to save her marriage, what are your thoughts?

Feel free to leave comments and debate the outcome of Bishop Weeks’ sentencing.

Juanita Bynum, Bishop Weeks, Bishop Weeks sentence, christians and domestic violence

Domestic violence occurs in Christian homes just as it does in the homes of non-believers. Christian women are at times beaten into submission, with their attacker misusing the Bible to justify their own evil. The church has an obligation to provide a safe environment for victims and to help a woman realize her true potential as a beloved child of God. But domestic violence is not just a woman’s issue; it is a family issue. Just as the woman needs the help of the church, so does her abuser.

Many men who violate their wives and families are third or fourth generation abusers/victims themselves. Their lack of respect for women is a learned behavior they inherited by watching their fathers, grandfathers, uncles, or other male influences. They may have watched their own mothers being abused. They saw the power that their own fathers or stepfathers wielded, and grew to believe that was man’s right. For these multigenerational abusers, being a “real man” equates with subduing his woman with whatever means necessary. The behavior is not about sex or a warped sense of love; it is about absolute control.

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The first Monday in October each year is the Day of Unity, kicking off Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Several writers here at 451 Press are dedicating their sites to the cause for the first few days of the month to raise awareness of domestic violence, get people involved, and remember the victims who are living in terror, or who have lived and died at the hands of their abusers. I have already written several posts on this important issue as it affects Christian women, and will continue to do so regardless of the month. But I urge you for the month of October to take time to learn all you can, help raise awareness, and assist in any way you can.

Jesus said, “And if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.” (Mark 3:25). A house in which domestic violence is occurring is a house divided. When a man and woman are joined in marriage, they are joined as one. But when a part of that one lives in fear, the dividing line has been drawn and the house will crumble. It may crumble through the sin of violence. It may be through attempting to raise children in an environment of fear rather than love. It may be by destroying the faith of all who live there. Rest assured, it will crumble.

In an abusive home, a man and woman are no longer joined in a Godly marriage. By lashing out against his wife, a man defies the Lord’s commandment to love his wife as he loves his own body. The house, however, is not the only dwelling that becomes divided. We can also see the parallel to the soul. For the Spirit of God lives within us, and we are His temple. An abusive husband divides this temple within his victim.

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For an update on Juanita Bynum, see the post “Celebrate Christmas with Juanita Bynum.“

Senior Pastor Brian S. Lewis of All Nations Church in Los Angeles rebuked Juanita Bynum in a sermon on national television.

“Juanita Bynum, you don’t like what you went through? You don’t like being stomped in the groin? You don’t like being beat by a man, why don’t you just sow a seed?” he asked. “You know why God is judging you because you can’t sow a seed to get out of your problems”

Watch the sermon:

God does not cause your husband to attempt to kill you! What do you think?

Source: EURweb.com

Juanita Bynum, All Nations Church

Thank you, April, for allowing me to join you on your blog. I’m hoping we can have lots of input from your readers, and that during the discussion, someone will find words of encouragement that will help them navigate their own situation or become a source of real inspiration and support to someone else.

The issue of domestic violence among Christians is an emotionally charged subject, fraught with conflicting convictions and opinions. My stance begins and ends with the conviction that the Bible teaches that life should be chosen over any possibility, however remotely, of being theologically incorrect.

I believe in God. I have chosen to place my faith and eternal destiny in the hands of his risen son, Jesus Christ. My relationship with my Savior is the most important relationship in my life. In my own life and practice, I hold the Word of God in the highest esteem. Without qualification, I believe the Bible is God breathed. And I believe every word it says.

But I also recognize that my understanding and interpretations of certain biblical passages concerning roles between husbands and wives are simply theology.

So are everyone else’s, as the Bible does not speak as plainly on the subject as some are convinced it does, but rather invites thoughtful study and gives plenty of latitude for husbands and wives to stay within biblical bounds concerning their marriage relationship without being forced into the more traditional roles if that is not what they both choose to do.

If any of us are ever called upon to choose between a woman’s life and well being over our own, possibly faulty, theology concerning sex-roles within marriage, then we had better choose the life.

Life, is always more important than theology.

Without fail, in every interview I grant, I am asked about the doctrine of submission and how I feel it may relate to abuse and domestic violence within Christian marriages. The subject is a veritable powder keg. Anyone who broaches the subject with an untraditional view is practically begging for an explosion, but I will volunteer to strike the match today.

I see wifely submission as the Holy Grail of many evangelical leaders and husbands. Wives and husbands are frequently assured, by their spiritual leaders, that if the wife will submit properly to her husband, then most problems within the marriage will magically disappear.

This solution is like searching for the Holy Grail. The Grail cannot be found. Even if a wife may adopt, or is coerced through scripture abuse into adopting a subordinate role in the relationship to that of her husband’s, the wife can never submit enough.

This approach to dealing with marital discord can and does lead to violence and even death when paired with a man who has anger issues and violent tendencies. Studies have shown that submissive behavior in battered wives, does not deflect violence at all, but rather seems to exacerbate it.

I have personally spoken with pastors who espouse such a strict view of wifely submission, they blame wives for their husband’s violent behavior. In varying degrees, this is not an uncommon attitude among evangelical pastors. In some congregations, wives are subjected to church discipline when they begin to take responsibility for their own safety and well-being.

I received an email from a woman who recently divorced (only a few years ago). She shared that although her church leaders were aware that she was being battered, no church discipline was undertaken on the part of her church leadership against her violent husband. However, she was immediately placed under church discipline when she finally divorced him for beating her.

I was fortunate to have a supportive pastor when I divorced my violent husband. But during the years prior to that time, I found there was no escaping what I call the “church sanctioned oppression” most abused, church-going, Christian wives are usually required to endure–either overtly through the situation being ignored as they are instructed to stay and submit to the abuse, or covertly by being forced to deal with poorly concealed negative attitudes towards her for being married to an abusive man to begin with.

Along with multitudes of other abused wives, Christian or otherwise, I found myself withdrawing into silence and even beginning to shy away from developing new relationships due to the contempt and shame I experienced whenever someone rejected my friendship because of the abuse or became disgusted with me for not leaving the marriage.

The good news is, that with God, all things are possible.

When it became apparent that my husband was not going to seek help or change, wisdom entered into my heart and knowledge became pleasant to my soul, and God was more than able, at that time, to deliver me from the relationship–not only physically but emotionally as well.

We are challenged in the Bible to take responsibility for our own safety and eventual deliverance from the oppression of violence and abuse. At the same time, I know that we cannot do it ourselves, or, as a formerly battered friend so aptly phrased it, we would have gotten out the first time we were battered.

This opening statement leaves a great deal unsaid and by no means even comes close to dealing with the subject in depth. But it is my hope that we can round out the discussion during our time of questions and comments today.

April, thanks again for allowing me to visit your blog.

~~jocelyn andersen

Available now at www.Amazon.com or a bookstore near you
Woman Submit! Christians & Domestic Violence
A Book That Could Save Lives
http://WomanSubmit.net

Juanita Bynum is recovering from her injuries after being attacked and choked by her husband. The couple was reportedly separated and met at a hotel to discuss reconciliation. Her husband turned on her and began choking her, causing injuries severe enough to require medical treatment. Dr. Bynum’s MySpace page includes an entry from her today that she is resting well. She also quoted Proverbs 4:25: Let your eyes look right on with fixed purpose and let your gaze be straight before you. It is clear that Dr. Bynum’s faith in the Lord is guiding her through this difficult time.

On Life as a Christian Woman, we began looking into the issue of domestic abuse in Christian marriage last month. The blog carnival entries in Abuse Through the Eyes of Christian Women included posts from a United Methodist clergywoman, a Catholic, and other Christian women. Based on the correspondence from that article, and in light of the attack on Dr. Bynum by her preacher husband, it is clear that we cannot allow this issue to fade away again. Domestic abuse is serious problem and churches and Christians must begin to catch up with the secular world in providing education, support, and guidance for the victims of these crimes.

Jocelyn Andersen, the author of Woman Submit! Christians and Domestic Violence, will be appearing here on Life as a Christian Woman Tuesday, August 28. She will be available throughout the day to answer questions and comments about her book and her experience as a battered wife. I urge you to please join us to talk to Ms. Andersen and to learn from a survivor the effects of abuse and the church views and Christian support desperately needed to fight this problem.

The links in this post will lead you to the previous discussions that have appeared on this site, and to the site where you can read the first chapter of Ms. Andersen’s inspiring book. Please keep Dr. Juanita Bynum in your prayers, and join Jocelyn Andersen on Tuesday to take part in making a change for Christian women worldwide who are suffering at the hands of violent men.

christian women, christians and abuse, domestic violence, Juanita Bynum, Jocelyn Andersen, religion

For an update on Juanita Bynum, see the post “Celebrate Christmas with Juanita Bynum.”

Atlanta police have reported that Juanita Bynum and her preacher husband had an altercation in a hotel parking lot. She was battered and bruised, with bruising around her neck and upper torso.

Dr. Bynum is a well known televangelist, coference speaker, and gospel singer. Her Women On the Front Line conferences draw participants from around the United States. Dr. Bynum has traveled the world preaching God’s Word. Her ministries include books, music, speaking engagements, videos, mentorship programs, and many others.

With several events at Life as a Christian Woman focusing on Christian women and domestic violence, this story only reiterates how important this issue is. My deepest sympathies and prayers go out to Dr. Bynum during this trying time. She needs our spiritual strength and uplifting and our respect. I sincerely hope she realizes she does not have to deal with this alone, as so many battered women believe. I pray the Lord will guide her to take the hands that are reaching out to her.

For more on Dr. Bynum and her ministries, please visit her website.

Watch Juanita Bynum singing “One Night With the King.”

Juanita Bynum, christian women, domestic abuse, televangelist assaulted, prayer request

The experience of domestic abuse is not bound by religious beliefs, or a lack thereof. Christian women are subject to the same whims of violent men as their secular counterparts, but their options for coping with it are often limited by the views of the church. Divorce is forbidden, or at very least severely discouraged. Submission is expected. If the abuser is also a member of the church, silence by both spouses is strongly encouraged lest it cause a rift in the congregation. Prominent evangelical pastors counsel women to leave while the heat is on, then go back. These men also often add, “and avoid doing anything to make him angry.” So what do Christian women think about dealing with domestic abuse? From a United Methodist clergywoman, a devout Catholic, and others, some things are clear: You do not and will never have to deal with abuse alone — silence only encourages the sin of violence; the church has a responsibility to provide a safe haven for the wife and guidance for the husband; your life has a meaning, a purpose, and is precious to God — no man should be allowed to take away God’s creation; no matter what the church preaches, God will never ask you to repeatedly endanger your life — He has the power to change a man’s heart, but you do not.

The first entry comes from a United Methodist clergywoman. Her name and church have been withheld by request:

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