Christians Shouldn’t Swear, Da**it!
I have blogged about my husband’s annoying habit of snoring. I have a habit that annoys me, too. I swear. To myself. All the time. The daily running dialogue with myself in my head is scattered with “Forgive me, Lord”s throughout my waking hours. Fortunately, I am a careful speaker who usually thinks through every sentence before saying it, so I don’t unintentionally swear out loud. It is still a habit that annoys me, though. I learned to cuss (or curse, or swear) like a sailor long before I became a Christian. And it is a particularly appalling habit for a Christian woman.
It really did not take long to stop swearing out loud. But years after my conversion, I still call myself a dumba** (to my face, no less!) when I do something idiotic. If I pick up the phone to make call and the battery is dead, my first thought is still “Ah sh**!” I won’t mention what I think to myself if I see a little beady-eyed Southern creepy crawly in the kitchen. My monologues will definitely not leave you in mind of sweet Mrs. Jones from the front pew, though. If I am ever a victim of mind reading, I would probably be recommended for evaluation of Tourette’s Disorder, or a good soapy brain washing at the least.
Is it really so bad to cuss? More and more, those four-letter words are becoming a part of the everyday vocabulary. We hear it on television, in movies, radio, and books. We hear it in grocery stores and restaurants. Decades ago it was thought that a woman who used these words was undignified with a total lack of social skills and feminine grace. But there seems to be less and less of a distinction now. An oft used excuse is, “They are just words. Who decided those words were bad, anyway?” As in all things, Christians should take their cues on speech from the Bible.
“But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil.” (Matthew 5:37)
“But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation.” (James 5:12)
These passages refer to oaths such as, “I swear to God” or “By Seth’s breath” (an ancient Egyptian form of “hell’s bells”). In modern times, is this not what we do if we answer a question with “hell no!”? After all, there is only one hell, and it is a place, so we are swearing by hell that the answer is “no.” In Matthew 26:74, when Peter denied Jesus three times before the cock-crow, the passage says he began to “curse and swear.” These words show that not only did Peter deny Jesus, but he did so vehemently. The cuss words may have been in a different language, but they carried the same meaning and the same implication that it was against Jesus to cuss.
A simple “woops” or “uh oh” should be sufficient if the phone battery is dead or I misspell the word “intelligent” while typing, which ironically happens more than you would think. This unseemly habit of a Christian woman asking forgiveness for her thoughts several times a day must get very tiresome for God. I will continue to work on it, and perhaps one day the words of Matthew and James will finally sink in. Until then, I have visions of my Lord sitting in heaven with a big cuss jar by his side and a Post-It note with tally marks. I only hope that for each “Forgive me, Lord,” he is removing a mark!
christian women, christianity, christian communication, christian humor
June 20th, 2007 at 1:36 pm
hello, im a new reader so i don’t know if i ahve much room to tell you how to live. but in my view, your language should reflect your attitude. if you would say whoops in the same spirit as you’d say a swear word, there’s not difference. but you must be careful not to use word of any origin or type negatively against one of God’s beloved creatures. it’s all about where your heart is. my advice to you is to research why certain words or sounds are viewed as swear words, and other words that are comparable are ok to say.
June 20th, 2007 at 1:57 pm
I think I see it a little differently. We are *being* transformed by Christ. We can’t improve ourselves by sheer will–just as we can’t save ourselves. We must rely on Christ and Grace to do the work. I think it’s realizing that we don’t have to and literally can’t change ourselves into being Christ-like that opens us up for true change through allowing Christ to change us.
Phillipians 2:13
for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.
June 20th, 2007 at 2:49 pm
Swearing is simply about a negative attitude. I try to approach things as positively as possible, which has helped with my swearing. Personally, I don’t think that God minds the exact words we say, but rather the meanings behind them.
On a less-religious note, I wish people would work on their swearing because I’m sick of hearing “f this and f that” in places where there are children, like at a park or grocery store!
June 20th, 2007 at 4:22 pm
Hi April,
Last Saturday night, one of my kids brought home an abacus. He told me, “Mom, you should have heard what dad called it!!” I said “What did he call it? A-back-as*?!”
Well, I was wrong, and my 7 yr. old told me so, and said “Mom said a swear word!”
I tried to explain that as* also means donkey, but my husband gave me “the look”, so I stopped with the explanation. The next moening at church, where my husband is the Pastor, my 7 year old tells the greeter and everyone within hearing distance, that his mom said the “A” word last night.
Good impressions from the pastor’s wife, huh?
Anyhow, I wasn’t swearing per say, but the story fits.
I also think such words, a lot!
But my attitude is such that I want to be a good witness, and not say them…so most of the time I don’t. I can truly relate to your post.
December 13th, 2007 at 5:16 pm
Not cursing outloud is a courtesy to your listener’s ear and sensitivities.
Not cursing internally while to be striven for, is sometimes simply human weakness.
One wise lady I knew once told me that when ever she was tempted to curse a person out using the firetruck word, that she would instead say bless you.
Interestingly, I have found over the years that this simple substitution of words becomes a habit, then an internal phrase.
I’m still a work in progress, but often, when faced with particularly exasperating circumstances I find it avoids offending any of my listeners.