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Surviving the “Dark Night”

by Linda Williams

What do you do when your Christian spirit goes numb, disappears? I don’t mean a crisis of faith. Your faith is still strong, but something is missing in your soul.

It happens to all of us. It sneaks up on us and catches us unaware. Suddenly we realize that we feel apart from God, despite our constant search for Him.

Mother Teresa, who spent her life in God’s service, felt separated from Him so deeply that she wrote her mentors letters that begged for answers. She felt lonely and alone. It appears from her letters that her period of pain began shortly after her mission in the slums of Calcutta in 1948 (a mission she had begged, pleaded and nagged her superiors for over a period of years). As she dove into the underbelly of the world, a darkness overtook her spirit, a darkness that lasted through most of her ministry

In a book entitled Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light (Doubleday), she expresses through letters to her superiors, confessors and spiritual confidants that she is suffering from God’s perceived silence.

Jesus has a very special love for you. As for me, the silence and the emptiness is so great that I look and do not see, listen and do not hear.
— Mother Teresa to the Rev. Michael Van Der Peet, September 1979

Many non-Christians have called Mother Teresa’s agony proof that there is no god. But note that she says that Jesus has a special love for the reverend. She is not denying in any way God’s existence, but longs to hear His voice.

A feeling a separation from God does not negate His existence. The Catholic Church has long had a term for this period in one’s faith-walk, called the “Dark Night of the Soul.” St. John of the Cross coined the phrase in the 1500’s, and it describes a period of darkness within the faith… not from outside, not from unbelief, but from within the faith.

We all face this at one time or another, on varying scales. In my own period of doubt and hurt, I struggled to see the light that Christ brings us. The light was still there, but my vision was blocked. A friend of mine likes to say that when we feel set apart from God, we need to check our compass and make sure that we are not so enmeshed in the horizontal (this world) that we are missing the vertical (God in His Heaven).

We are human. We will have these “dark nights.” But even in our darkest hour, our Holy Father is there. Even when we feel empty and alone, the Holy Spirit is in us. When we become so mired in the sins of the world that we feel there is no way out, Christ is sitting by the Father, interceding on our behalf.

The final words of the Great Commission, from Matthew 28:16-20, says it all, and are the words where we find our comfort in these times:

And lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world.
Matthew 28:20b


2 Responses to “Surviving the “Dark Night””

  1. Katie Says:

    of course, i know where this topic came from!!!! thanks for the research and the wonderful insights.
    faith is a journey. the L never changes, but He leads us through experiences to draw us ever closer to Him. the “dark night” is a beconning from Him to desire refinement…to desire more…and to see new aspects of His character. it is a dependence on Him. granted, it’s not at all fun, but sometimes it is necessary and beautiful.
    if you find yourself in the “dark night,” then you should sift through your life and check for any unconfessed sin. after repenting and reassessing, if the numbness persists then prepare your body, mind, heart, and spirit to walk in continued obedience to our S’vior, keeping a watchful eye for the small glimpses of His hand. it is always there. you just have to get past your “woe is me, i’m numb” state to the point of assurance in the Almighty One.
    again…faith is a journey.

  2. Gayle Says:

    Thank you, Linda and Katie for illuminating this topic.

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About Life as a Christian Woman

Life as a Christian Woman explores Biblical truths as they apply to modern faith and the vital roles we can play in the body of Christ. Some topics are easy, such as Christ died for our sins. Others, like divorce, single parenthood, work, and submission to our spouses are more challenging. Then there are days we just need a good laugh with God. Together, we can learn practical faith in an impractical world.

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