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Who sets the example for your children?

by Linda Williams

miley-2.jpgThis is probably going to be a pretty random blog today… kind of my rant against the world. Hang in there with me!

Non-believers, and those who would love to portray Christians in a negative light, are always on the lookout for examples to prove that we are all hypocrites.

Most recently, I have seen subtle comments made regarding the photos of Miley Cyrus, particularly the one taken by Annie Leibovitz that appeared in Vanity Fair.

In case you haven’t seen it, the photo shows Cyrus with what appears to be a satin sheet held over her chest, bare-backed, looking over her shoulder. Somewhat of a “come hither” photo, as my mom would say. There is no nudity, but it is implied.

Now, since Cyrus is a stalwart of the Disney Family (”Hannah Montana”on the Disney Channel), the media were quick to jump on the story. Oh, Disney’s sweetheart and current top-money maker is going down the Britney/Lindsay path to destruction.

Fair enough comparison, considering that path is pretty well-worn by now. And inappropriate photos which appeared online, where Cyrus is shown showing off her bra (while wearing it) added fuel to the fire, as it were.

People Magazine covered the “scandal,” alluding to the Cyrus family’s strong Christian faith… breathlessly wondering what went wrong… could she and her faith be phony? This is the same magazine that applauded the Cyrus family and their values a few short months ago.

Parents of her fans are being quoted as being “disappointed,” “saddened,” and worried about how this will effect their daughters

OK, I have a few problems with this whole thing.

First of all… we should all know by now that if we are allowing “personalities” to serve as the primary influence in our children’s lives, then we aren’t doing our jobs as parents. Sure, they will naturally want to imitate and emulate these “stars,” but our duty is to keep it in perspective for our children, and not let them become so involved that they are willing to give up their character to copy a “character.”

Second, if we want to raise morally-responsible, strong Christian children, we need to give them less Hannah Montana and more of Christ. When was the last time you had a devotional with your child? Knelt at the side of their bed at night and prayed? Went as a family to church? Those are the difference makers. Hannah Montana is here today, gone tomorrow. Christ is forever, and our children need to know that!

But here is the kicker, at least for me. I agree that the photos are inappropriate. I agree 100% that they should have never been taken, much less published. But I have seen worse. And not in Hollywood.

This past weekend my four year old daughter and I went to a dance competition. My friend had a four year old in the competition, which was for all ages and included all types of dance (ballet, jazz, tap, hip hop, show as well as solo, group, and duet and trio). Emilee was so excited, and we had a blast. But my friend warned me when one category was about to start that it might not be appropriate. I poo-pooed her. Heck, they were four and five year olds, how bad could it be?

Bad.

Very Bad.

Moves that strippers would be proud to do, in fact. We headed out of the auditorium pretty quickly, coming back when that category was over. But it turned out that creative dance instructors and parents can work questionable dance moves into any type of routine (ok, ballet seemed immune). Even tap. TAP, for goodness sake!

Now, here is the amazing part (to me, at least… and I promise I wasn’t raised in a cave).

I didn’t see very much of this suggestive kind of dance out of the older kids or young adults. In fact, it was almost entirely performed by the 4-8 year old dancers. And when they would “bust a move” the moms and dads in the audience would go wild. These children were performing very sexually suggestive moves.

I wondered how many of these same moms and dads would have their children in church the next day. If so, talk about a mixed message. If not, are these the same parents who were so “disturbed” by the Miley Cyrus photos?

Here we are, as Christians, with the greatest example of parenthood in the world, and we forget to use Him. That’s right, God. He is our Father. Our relationship with Him should be the one we use to model our relationship with our children.

A comment you hear a lot in this world is how children don’t come with an instruction book. Yes, they do… The Bible. God’s word. You may have to study it, pray over it. But can you think of a better book to lead you in parenting?

Who is setting an example for your children? And is it the right example?

For wonderful insights into Christian parenting, visit Parenting and Religion


4 Responses to “Who sets the example for your children?”

  1. Katie Says:

    great blog, linda. i completely agree, of course! keep up the awesome work, both on your blogs, and in raising your wonderful, beautiful, and J-loving little girl! you are a wonderful mother, writer, confidant, and friend. i love you.

  2. Parenting and Religion » Blog Archive Says:

    [...] about being a woman of faith, and living the Christian Life. I would encourage you to read her post “Who Sets the Example for Your Children?”Being the main example for your children is important, and too often parents in general trust in the [...]

  3. dede Says:

    How true, Emily is very lucky, to have parents with there head on straight

  4. The (Almost) Amazing Mammarino Says:

    Hi Linda! I’m sitting with the one who invited you to the dance competition you mentioned. GREAT post! My favorite lines:

    “First of all… we should all know by now that if we are allowing “personalities” to serve as the primary influence in our children’s lives, then we aren’t doing our jobs as parents.”

    “Second, if we want to raise morally-responsible, strong Christian children, we need to give them less Hannah Montana and more of Christ.”

    I love your writing style! I’m definitely adding you to my blogroll!

    Blessings!!!

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About Life as a Christian Woman

Life as a Christian Woman explores Biblical truths as they apply to modern faith and the vital roles we can play in the body of Christ. Some topics are easy, such as Christ died for our sins. Others, like divorce, single parenthood, work, and submission to our spouses are more challenging. Then there are days we just need a good laugh with God. Together, we can learn practical faith in an impractical world.

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